The characters, plotlines, quotes, etc. included here are owned by Chris Carter and 1013 Productions, all rights reserved. The following transcript is in no way a substitute for the show "The X Files" and is merely meant as a homage. This transcript is not authorized or endorsed by Chris Carter, 1013 Productions, or Fox Entertainment. It was painstakingly typed out by Neo and made available for your personal enjoyment by me, DrWeesh from my website, The X Files Transcripts Archive


(Scenes from "Unusual Suspects (5X01)")

CHRIS CARTER: Previously, on the X-Files...

SUSANNE MODESKI: My name is Susanne Modeski ... I was an organic chemist for the Advanced Weapons Facility ... I need to expose the US government's plot against its own people.

(Modeski kisses Byers.)

MODESKI: Tell the truth. Reach as many people as you can with it, that's your weapon.

(Modeski is pulled into a non-descript car by two Men in Black and Mr. X.)

BYERS: Susanne!

(The car drives off.)

(Cut to black.)

(Fade in on a picturesque suburban home, as a white family car pulls up in front of it and Byers steps out.)

BYERS: (vo) My name is John Fitzgerald Byers. I was named after our 35th president, and I keep having this beautiful dream. In my dream, the events of November 22nd, 1963, never happened. In it, my namesake was never assassinated. Other things are different, too, in my dream. My country is hopeful and innocent; young again. Young in spirit. My fellow citizens trust their elect officials, never once having been betrayed by them. My government is truly "of the people, by the people, for the people." All my hopes for my country, for myself ...all are fulfilled. I have everything a person could want: home and family ...and love. Everything that counts for anything in life ... I have it. But the dream ends the same way every time. I lose it all.

(As the voice-over progresses, he picks up the mail as he pushes through the fence gate and starts up the walkway. At the door, he is met by two twin girls (House number 1057). He enters the house with his daughters, passing through the foyer, into the kitchen, and, leaving the girls in the house, out onto the back patio where he greets his golden retriever. He continues, passing from the patio to the backyard lawn, where he crosses the grass to find Susanne Modeski under a tree. Susanne runs to him, hugging him and giving him a kiss. Pan around them until we are behind Byers, our view cut off by his coat, and as we pan around in front of him again, we see him standing in a desert, holding a gold ring. Track out to see him alone in the landscape.)

(Fade to Black)



(Fade in on a portion of the Las Vegas Strip, as we pan across to see a large sign reading "DEF-CON '99," which then changes to "WELCOME DEFENSE CONTRACTORS.")

(Inside a casino, we pan across the game floor to the front door of a private suite.)

(Inside the private suite, we see a pair of hands deftly shuffling and bridging a deck of cards. Crane up to see the face of the man doing the shuffling.)

SHUFFLING MAN: The game is Texas Hold 'Em, gentlemen.

(Pan around the table to a Glasses Man on the Shuffling Man's left.)

GLASSES MAN: Bring your wife?

(Pan around to the Glasses Man's left to see the Bald Man.)

BALD MAN: You think I'm sitting here, I'd bring my wife? Dumb ass brought his wife.

(Pan around to the Bald Man's left to see the Bearded Man.)

BEARDED MAN: 'Cause I'm the man; I say I'm playing poker, I play poker. Meanwhile, your wife is back in Plaino, boinking the mailman.

(The Bearded Man turns to his left to face an undercover Byers in bone-rimmed glasses.)

BEARDED MAN: Hey, what's your name again?

BYERS: Funston. Stewart Funston.

BALD MAN: You bring a little lady, Stewart?

BYERS: Not married.

GLASSES MAN: Smart man, (tosses in a chip) hundred.

BYERS: You's guys come to this every year? Def-con?

GLASSES MAN: Every year. (looks at his cards) Ah, fold.

BALD MAN: Wouldn't miss it.

BEARDED MAN: Yeah. (throws down cards) Out!

BYERS: So, you guys, uh, working on anything interesting these days?

BALD MAN: Same old black ops crapola. You know what it's like.

GLASSES MAN: Hey, we're doing some neat stuff with neutron bombardment. Yeah, you can cook somebody's brain in their skull, like hard-boiling an egg.

(Byers mouths the word "wow." The Glasses Man looks at the Shuffling Man who does not look pleased.)

GLASSES MAN: (defensively) It's neat stuff.

BALD MAN: Speaking of crapola ... (throws in cards) ... fold.

(Cut to the Glasses Man as a waiter, who we recognize as Frohike, approaches with a napkin and drink for the Shuffling Man. The Shuffling Man hands him a black chip.)


FROHIKE: Oh ... a man of distinction.

(Frohike glances at Byers and the Shuffling Man catches Byers as he drops his eyes back to his cards.)

SHUFFLING MAN: So you in, Mr. Funston?

BYERS: Yeah. (he throws some chips into the pot)

SHUFFLING MAN: Looks like it's just (throws in chips) you and me.

(Byers adds more chips to the pot)

BYERS: Another 200.

SHUFFLING MAN: I'll see your 200 ... (more chips in the pot) ... and raise you one ... (plops more chips in the pot) ... thousand.

BALD MAN: Huh whoa!

BEARDED MAN: He's buying the pot stew.

BALD MAN: Three clubs showing ... could be a flush.

BYERS: One thousand. (adds his chips to the pot) And I raise you ... (more chips) ... one thousand.

GLASSES MAN: The stones he has ...

(Frohike coughs in an exaggerated fashion, the Shuffling Man pays attention but doesn't look at him)

SHUFFLING MAN: (pointing at Byers' DEF-CON badge) I see you work for Conglomerate. You guys make a great AE-135 unit.

(Behind Byers' head, we track in tight on his right ear to see a tiny receiver unit.)

LANGLY: (oc) Oh man ... don't freak ... don't ...

(Cut to another room somewhere in the hotel, where Langly sits at a computer with a headset on. There are two monitors in front of him, one which he uses to search for the information and one showing a camera's view of the card game from behind Byers' hand.)

LANGLY: ...freak. I'm on it. 442 J-stroke, A-135 air conditioning units for B-2 bombers. Talk air conditioners.

(Cut back to the private suite, on Byers.)

BYERS: Oh yeah, the AE-135 is a beauty. Keeps the B-2's frosty, can practically see your breath.

SHUFFLING MAN: How'd you get all the bugs out of it?

BYERS: Ah, you know, trade secrets.

SHUFFLING MAN: Oh, come on, Stewart. You're among friends. Seriously, how'd you get past the delamination thing?

(Cut back to Langly's room.)

LANGLY: Delamination ... searching.

(Cut back to the private suite.)

SHUFFLING MAN: Oh, uh, I'm sorry. I'll see your thousand ... (drops chips into the pot) ... and raise you ... (sweeps his hand over Byers' pile of chips) ... all you've got.

(Cut back to Langly's room.)

LANGLY: Systems tests, error rates ... nothing. Stall 'em. And fold.

((NEONOTE: Langly's t-shirt of the episode; Snoozonica) Cut back to the private suite.)

BYERS: You wanna know how we fixed the delamination problem? We subcontracted the whole damn thing to the Japanese, then triple-billed the government. Same thing we always do. (the other men at the table laugh except the Shuffling Man. Byers pushes his stack of chips into the pile and drops his cards to the table) Queen-high flush.

SHUFFLING MAN: (smiles and drops his cards) King-high. (Frohike drops his tray) Al, call security. Have them pick up Mr. "Funston" here. (points at Frohike) And his partner.

BYERS: Delamination ... you made that up?

SHUFFLING MAN: My advice to you, Stewart, or whatever your name really is, poker is not your game.

(Byers and Frohike are escorted from the private suite. The gorilla-sized security guard pushes Byers and Frohike back out to the game floor. Frohike is now dressed in a white undershirt and suspenders as they've taken his casino jacket.)

FROHIKE: Hey man, you wanna thunderdome, let's go.


(Back to Langly's room, Byers and Frohike return.)

LANGLY: Three thousand dollars ... I told you to fold. It should have been me in there playing, why does Byers get to do the undercover?

FROHIKE: (flicking Langly's hair) 'Cause this ain't Woodstock.

BYERS: Did we at least get some usable prints off the drink glasses?

FROHIKE: What, are you kidding? We had to leave them all behind. How we gonna salvage this?

LANGLY: We're not. This convention's a bust. Five days and three grand invested and we got bupkiss to show for it.

BYERS: Who was that player, anyway? The guy who made us, he wasn't wearing a convention badge.

LANGLY: Nobody ever said his name.

BYERS: I think he's worth looking into.

(Suddenly, there are three knocks on the door. All three of them look up in surprise, then at each other. Frohike moves to the door and flicks off the lights, checking through the peep hole. Outside, two gangly-looking men, Jimmy and Timmy, stand by the door. Jimmy is wearing a t-shirt that reads "Government Patsy.")

JIMMY: CIA, open up.

(Frohike opens the door.)

FROHIKE: Hey, hey, hey. Jimmy and Timmy.

JIMMY: Hey. Where were you guys today?

BYERS: Around.

TIMMY: Oh yeah? Maybe snooping for some hot 411?

JIMMY: On the sneak tip?

LANGLY: Maybe...

TIMMY: Yeah, well maybe we were too.

JIMMY: And maybe we got some.

FROHIKE: Well maybe we did too.

JIMMY: (fronting for a moment, then gives up) Ah, we got bupkiss. Buncha tight lipped defense contractors.

FROHIKE: Yeah, well I'm gonna go way out on a limb here and say, it's the t-shirt.

LANGLY: Yeah, maybe both of you could wear one that says "I'm with stupid."

JIMMY: You just don't get it, man. This says that I'm on to them. This says that I comprehend the military industrial power dynamic. That's what this whole thing is about; wetworks, political assassination. That's their theme for this year.

BYERS: Where did you hear that?

JIMMY: Oh yeah, like I'm gonna reveal my sources. Suffice it to say, there's some big new stealth assassination technology that's supposed to be unveiled here. And I will be there, front row.

(Frohike makes a face at Jimmy like kids do on the schoolyard)

TIMMY: In the meantime, we're hitting the restaurant.

JIMMY: Yeah, all you can eat lobster buffet.

TIMMY: Free floor show ... plenty of boobage. You guys down?

(Langly nods and starts to leave)

BYERS: You go ahead.

(Langly leaves with Timmy and Jimmy.)

FROHIKE: I'll catch up.

(Frohike closes the door (Room number 1044). He and Byers retreat into the hotel room.)

FROHIKE: You're one hell of a sad-sack, Byers.

(Byers sits down at the computer desk)

BYERS: Lay off about the poker game.

FROHIKE: No, that's not what I'm talking about. (he sits down on the bed facing Byers and starts putting on his cool fingerless gloves) You're the one who pushes the hardest for us to come to these conventions, then you get all squirrelly once we get here. You're still looking for her, aren't you? Susanne Modeski.

BYERS: We met her at a convention.

FROHIKE: Ten years ago. In Baltimore. Now we both know what happened to her. Most likely, she's dead.

BYERS: No. She was a brilliant scientist, too important to the government.

FROHIKE: Buddy, either way, I know we're both hoping she's in a better place than Las Vegas. C'mon. All you can eat lobster.

(Byers smiles.)


(On the game floor, Byers and Frohike head to the restaurant.)

BYERS: I almost won.

FROHIKE: Yeah, you and everyone else. (Stops at a slot machine - modest jackpot for Vegas; only $29,153.43) Whoa, Byers, check this out. I'm feeling lucky.

(Frohike drops a coin and pulls the level, but as the rollers spin, Byers attention is quickly drawn away by something else. Across the floor, he sees Susanne Modeski. (When the first roller stops, it's a BAR, but when we see it again, it's a space instead. What gives?))

BYERS: It can't be.


(Byers starts across the floor, searching through row after row of slot machines. Just ahead of him, we see Susanne walking obliviously across the game floor. Byers notices her and gives chase, running into an older man and knocking him over, going down as well. The man's cup full of coins is scattered all over the floor.)

BYERS: I'm so sorry. I'm sorry.

(When Byers looks up, Susanne is nowhere to be found. Frohike catches up.)

FROHIKE: Byers ... what the hell's going on?


(Dana Scully's apartment. The cellphone ringing next to her bed wakes her up. She turns on the light and answers.)

SCULLY: Yeah, Scully.

MULDER'S VOICE: (oc) Hey, Scully, it's me.

SCULLY: Mulder, what time is it?

MULDER'S VOICE: (oc) 2:34AM. (beat) Listen, Scully, I need you on the next flight to Las Vegas.

SCULLY: Las Vegas? Why?

MULDER'S VOICE: (oc) It's the Lone Gunmen. They're onto something big.

SCULLY: What, exactly?

(Back in the Lone Gunmen's hotel room, we see a computer screen, which we quickly realize is synthesizing Mulder's voice. The computer is being operated by none other than Byers.)

MULDER'S VOICE: It's really important. Trust me.

SCULLY: Yeah, I trust you, Mulder, it's the Three Stooges I'm not so sure about.

(Langly and Frohike exchange a look)

MULDER'S VOICE: Look, I can't talk over an unsecured line. Please just get here. It's an emergency.

(Back to Scully as she sighs and gives in)

SCULLY: Okay. Okay, okay. Okay.

(She hangs up, cut back to The Lone Gunmen)

LANGLY: What if she calls him back?

BYERS: I trapped her cell number. If she calls him, it rings here.

FROHIKE: (laughs) She's gonna kick our ass. What do you need Scully for, anyway?

BYERS: We're up against agents of the government. We need our own government agent.

LANGLY: And that would be Mulder. Why do you want just Scully?

FROHIKE: (laughs and shakes his head) She's gonna kick our ass.

BYERS: (getting agitated) Mulder's too high profile. He's virtually a household name to the black ops who kidnapped Susanne in Baltimore.

LANGLY: Byers, I've hacked into the hotel computers, Susanne Modeski's not registered here. Are you sure you saw her; are you absolutely, positively sure?

BYERS: It was her. She's here. I've got to find her!

FROHIKE: You've gotta find some ice, you need a drink.

(Cut to the inside of an ice machine as Byers opens it and fills up a small bucket. About to head back to his hotel room, he hears the elevator bell ding and then sees the Shuffling Man pass going down the hallway. Byers follows him to a room, where he knocks and is answered by Susanne Modeski. (Hotel room 1066) Byers watches from his hiding place around the corner of the hallway as The Shuffling Man kisses her, then enters the room. Susanne closes the door with the "Do Not Disturb" sign hung from the handle. Byers looks surprised and concerned.)

[Fade to black]


(From the bottom of the ice bucket, we see Byers drop his face into the cold water.)

LANGLY: (oc) Byers is trying to kill himself.

(Across the room, Langly and Frohike sit at a computer terminal.)

FROHIKE: Stop trying to kill yourself, Byers, it's not deep enough. Come see what we got. Room 1066, registered to our mystery poker player, one Grant Ellis. New Mexico plates on his car.

LANGLY: Which come back listed "DoD motor pool." Signed out from...

BYERS: (reads the screen) Whitestone, New Mexico. (License plate number 5J493-DL4)

FROHIKE: The advanced army weapons facility. Where Susanne worked.

LANGLY: Ellis's credit cards get billed directly to the Administrative Offices. He's looking like he's some kind of shadow government "poobah."

BYERS: He brainwashed her.

(Langly and Frohike exchanges looks.)

BYERS: Well that's what they do there! The AH gas she developed. Call it psychological warfare, behavior modification, but it's all about mind control. And undoubtedly, the process has been refined in the last decade. She ran from them, refused to take part in their tests, their crimes against the American people, there's no way she would choose to be working for them now, working for that guy ... (he spits out the words with disgust) ... kissing him. Clearly he brainwashed her.

(Frohike and Langly exchange another look.)

FROHIKE: I know a way to find out.


(In the hallway, Frohike, wearing a one-piece overall with the word "Maintenance" on the back and carrying a duffle bag over his shoulder, makes his way to room 1066. He is cut off by a maid before approaching the door.)

FROHIKE: Buenos dias.

(Frohike drops back and watches as the maid opens door 1066. He lifts up his glove to check the time on his watch and winces.)

(Cut to the game floor, near the private suite. Byers walks by wearing glasses, his hand to his temple. He spots something and crouches by a vase of flowers to look. He sees the security guard from earlier, Al, checking people going into a conference room. He shakes his head, returns to the lobby where Langly is waiting and takes off the glasses.)

BYERS: I can't get into the conference. The guard who threw me out is working the door.

LANGLY: Let me go.

(Byers picks up a section of Langly's hair with his fingers. Suddenly, Jimmy and two other guys, a Red-Headed Guy and a Bald Guy, sneak up behind Byers, Jimmy grabbing his shoulder.)

JIMMY: CIA, freeze.

(The three crack up laughing, Jimmy high-fiving one of the other guys.)

LANGLY: That just keeps getting funnier. Where's your girlfriend, Timmy?

JIMMY: Ah, out in the desert. There's this naked chick who'll teach you how to shoot machine guns. It costs 200 beans though, I told him he was a putz. (notices Byers) What's the matter, Byers? Your bestest dog die? What's up?

LANGLY: Trying to figure out how to get into the Saguaro Room.

RED-HEADED GUY: Good luck. That's the Holy Grail. Bug sweeps...

BALD GUY: Casino security outside, government security inside. There's no way any of us are getting in.

JIMMY: I can get in there. And I will, too. When the time is right.

LANGLY: Doo-doo, kaa-kaa, poo-poo.

JIMMY: Oh, go brush your hair, Michael Bolton. (His two buddies laugh) There's a hole in their security, I've got it all figured out. But there's nothing worth hearing in there until tomorrow, when they unveil their new assassination technology.

LANGLY: Again with the assassination technology.

BYERS: I need to get in there, Jimmy. I need to know what's happening in there today. If you can really get in there, prove it.


(Inside of a ventalation shaft, Jimmy crawls through the thin duct. He flips open the slats of one of the vent gates to see inside the room where Grant Ellis is giving a presentation and starts video recording the conference with a small digital camera. We can vaguely make out what Ellis is saying.)

ELLIS: .... in combat can be established. Now, if you'll take a look at the kill ratio productivity chart we've provided for you and turn to ... page 22 there ... you'll see that we've experienced a marked ...

(Jimmy zooms in one Susanne Modeski seated at the conference table.)

JIMMY: Oooh, there's your fascist chickie, Byers.

ELLIS: ... first and second quarterly periods of the previous year. But, before we're tempted to pat ourselves on the back for this we have to remember these figures ...

(Looking down into the room, Jimmy suddenly recognizes someone seated at one of the tables.)

JIMMY: Timmy? (zooms in) Damn...

ELLIS: .... the current operations in Bagdad. These operations, originally budgeted for fiscal year '97, were ... if you'll refer to page 26, I believe ...

(Suddenly, Jimmy leans on a soft spot and causes the metal to make a small thud. Timmy turns his head to look as Jimmy quickly slides back out of the vent. He kicks open the vent gate he first came through, only to be suddenly pulled out of the shaft by two Men in Black.)

JIMMY: Oh, woah, woah! Hey, hold on! Hold on!

(The Men in Black hold Jimmy up against the wall as Timmy enters from the shadows.)

JIMMY: You're one of them ...

(Timmy takes the digital camera and hands it to one of the Men in Black.)

TIMMY: You really screwed things up, Jimmy.

(Timmy quickly checks Jimmy for a weapon.)

TIMMY: We had big plans for you.

JIMMY: Big plans?

(Timmy points to the words "Government Patsy" on Jimmy's t-shirt. Jimmy finally gets it.)

JIMMY: Political assassination. I was right. I was right about the whole thing!

TIMMY: Every good plan needs a patsy.

(Timmy nods to one of the Men in Black, who holds Jimmy's head to the side. Timmy then gives him an injection behind the ear with a metallic instrument.)


(Back in the casino lobby, Byers and Langly approach Scully, who has just arrived and is handing her bags over to a bellhop.)

SCULLY: Could you, uh, take this up, please?


(Bellhop leaves as Byers and Langly arrive.)

BYERS: Agent Scully.

SCULLY: Where's Agent Mulder, I've been trying to call him.

LANGLY: He's, uh, I think that his phone's messed up.

BYERS: He may be hard to reach for the next few hours, he suggested we work with you, bring you up to speed.

SCULLY: By all means, bring me up to speed.

(Byers is about to explain when four people pass by walking quickly, a female manager, a security guard and two paramedics.)


FEMALE MANAGER: (to her radio) Subject's name is James Bellmont, over. (to other guards) This way.

LANGLY: Oh, man. Jimmy.

(Outside, the three guards, along with Byers, Langly and Scully, run to a bus that has stopped.)

BUS DRIVER: He just jumped; no warning, no nothing. He just, dived right out in front of me.

(Camera pans down to a very dead and very bloody Jimmy under the wheel, his glasses pushed down and covering his mouth.)

LANGLY: Oh, God, it is Jimmy.

BUS DRIVER: It's not my fault. He was just standing there, and then he just dives under the bus.

BYERS: This wasn't a suicide.

SCULLY: You know this man?

(Byers leaves.)

SCULLY: What's going on here?

(Langly doesn't answer. Scully lets out a big sigh.)


(Back inside the hotel, the maid is finally leaving room 1066. After she is out of sight, Frohike emerges from the doorway of the room down the hall where he's been waiting and opens the door with a keycard hacking unit. Cut to the view from inside the duffle bag as Frohike pulls out a screwdriver and then a small digital camera. Cut to inside the vent as he pulls off the grate and begins to put the camera inside. He stops and put his camera down on the floor as our view is pulled back to show Frohike's face illuminated on another camera's viewscreen. He grabs the camera and pulls out the tape. Suddenly he hears someone opening the door and he quickly replaces the camera and then the grate. Just as Susanne Modeski enters the room, he heads into the bathroom. She passes the bathroom door and changes into a bathrobe before heading for the bathroom. Just as she is about to enter, three knocks eminate from the door. She leaves the bathroom door for the front door, checking through the peep hole to see who it is. Outside in the hallway, Byers stands by as Susanne opens the door.)

BYERS: Susanne, do you remember me?

MODESKI: John, what are you doing here?

BYERS: I'm here to save you.

MODESKI: From what?

BYERS: I don't think you are yourself. I think that, uh, you've been mistreated and confused, and, and, I'm afraid that your, your beliefs, your opinions, are no longer your own.

MODESKI: As in, I've been brainwashed? I don't know what to tell you. I haven't been.

BYERS: Your life may be in danger, Susanne. A friend of mine has just been killed. Murdered.


BYERS: And that man that you're with...

MODESKI: My fiance?

(Byers looks stunned.)

MODESKI: I'm sorry John, I, I think you better go.

(Susanne starts to close the door, but Byers stops her.)

BYERS: No, wait. Wait. Ten years ago, I saw you thrown into a car. Kidnapped right in front of me. Did that not happen? Did I just dream all of that?

MODESKI: It happened. But things got better.

(Susanne takes Byers' hand off the door and closes it. She locks the door, then heads into the bathroom. As she runs a bath, we see the vent gate in the ceiling close back into place as Frohike makes his escape.)

(Outside in the hall, Byers is leaving when a bag falls from the ceiling and hits him in the head. He looks up to see an open vent gate with Frohike's head poking out.)

FROHIKE: Oops. Sorry, buddy.

(Frohike drops from the vent gate, lands, and pulls the tape out of his pocket to show it to Byers.)

FROHIKE: That Susanne's a popular girl.


SCULLY: You're absolutely sure you wanna be here for this?

LANGLY: Oh yeah. I'm cool. Let's just find out what killed him.


(As Scully uncovers the body, Langly looks horrified. Scully clicks on the microphone above her and begins the autopsy.)

SCULLY: James Bellmont, age 29. Visual exam reveals injuries consistent with massive trauma. Multiple rib fractures with concomgent haemorrhaging, both internal and external. His spine is fractured and partially exposed.

LANGLY: What if "they" did something to him? You know, to make him pancake himself?

SCULLY: Who's "they?"

LANGLY: You know, "them."

(Scully nods with a yeah-right attitude.)

SCULLY: I'll begin with the Y-incision.

(Scully pulls the surgical mask over her nose and mouth, puts on a pair of goggles and proceeds to make the cuts of the Y-incision. As she penetrates the flesh, Langly looks around uncomfortably. When the incision is finished, she peels back the first flap of skin, at which point Langly looks away. While the camera view doesn't show much, the blood and exposed ribs reflect clearly in Scully's goggles. Langly's glasses reflect the same scene but not clearly as he can't stop shaking. As Scully proceeds, Langly looks more and more ready to vomit.)

SCULLY: Langly, will you go over there and pass me the striker saw please, it's right there on the counter.

(Langly picks up the saw, but finally loses it, dropping the saw and rushing out through the double doors to throw up in the next room.)

SCULLY: Are you okay, Langly?

(Scully leans down to pick up the saw, but as she stands back up, she notices a small needle-puncture wound behind Jimmy's right ear. Just as she is about to stand up, though, Timmy grabs her from behind, his hand over her mouth, and gives her the same injection he gave Jimmy earlier.)

[Fade to black]


(Back in Clark County Morgue, Langly is still suffering from nauseous trauma. He continues to throw up in the sink with the water running. He hears a thud in the autopsy room as Scully drops to the floor after receiving Timmy's injection.)

LANGLY: Scully?

(Langly stumbles back into the autopsy room to find Scully unconscious on the floor. He hurries to her and revives her.)

LANGLY: Scully. Wake up. Are you okay?

(He supports her back as she gets into a seated position.)

SCULLY: What happened?

LANGLY: I'm thinking that you got a little queasy and took a header. You know blood and guts can bother some people.

(She removes her mask and speaks slowly.)

SCULLY: Yeah, I guess.

LANGLY: You gonna be alright?

(She turns to look at him.)

SCULLY: Sure, cutie.

(Langly looks confused. Scully struggles back to her feet, swaying slightly. She grabs some of the sheet covering Jimmy's body as she stands and quickly covers the body with it pulling off her gloves.)

LANGLY: So ... you're done with Jimmy?

SCULLY: Done, done, done. (tries to push table) How do you roll this thing?

LANGLY: Uhhhm, Scully? What killed him?

SCULLY: My medical opinion? BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP! (claps hands loudly)

LANGLY: And that's all you found?

SCULLY: That's all I know.

(Scully tries to push the table again, but loses her footing and slips, falling to the floor again.)

LANGLY: Scully?


(Back in the Lone Gunmen's hotel room, Frohike inserts the tape he took from the camera in Susanne's room and plays it.

BYERS: What'd you find out?

LANGLY: Autopsy was negatory. Jimmy squished himself.

FROHIKE: And where is the scrumptious Agent Scully?

LANGLY: She said she had something important to do. Man, she is seriously jetlagged. (looks at tape) You got product already?

FROHIKE: No, an earlier bird got the worm. (starts tape)

MODESKI ON TAPE:'s like they're keeping tabs on us, watching us.

ELLIS ON TAPE: Honey, you worry too much. The plan is still on schedule. Everything's falling into place. We've worked so long and so hard for this.

(As Ellis begins kissing Modeski, Byers stops the tape.)

BYERS: It's not her. They're making her do this somehow.

FROHIKE: Buddy, now, I know something about the fairer sex. Trust me, you can bring a horse to water, but you can't make her drink.

BYERS: She would not marry that man.

MODESKI: You don't know him like I do.

(Byers, Langly and Frohike turn to see Modeski standing in their open doorway.)

LANGLY: How'd you get in here?

(Modeski holds up the keycard hacking unit that Frohike used to break into her room.)

MODESKI: One of you left this in my room.

(Langly takes the unit and hands it to an embarrassed Frohike.)

MODESKI: Grant Ellis saved my life. He's saved the lives of thousands.

FROHIKE: (laughs) Hah.

MODESKI: I need to talk to you, John, I need to try and explain everything.

LANGLY: (to Frohike) C'mon, let's hit the slots.

FROHIKE: (to Byers) Watch your back. (to Modeski) Mata Hari.

(Langly and Frohike leave.)

MODESKI: You said something about a friend being murdered.

BYERS: Not that I can prove it. But I think he saw something he was not supposed to see at your conference. You may be in danger.

MODESKI: I am. Always. So is Grant. (turns away) I've thought about this moment so many times. All the things I would say to you if I ever saw you again. And then there you were, at my door, and I ... (turns back to Byers) They took me ten years ago. They did things to me. And it was like drowning every day; under water, struggling to breathe, and one day, a hand broke the surface, reached down and pulled me up. I wanted it to be you, John. It was Grant. He worked for them on The Project. I didn't trust him, not for years. Not until I realized that he was working against them in his own way; stalling them, sabotaging their tests. He reminded me of you.

(Cut to the game floor, Langly and Frohike gambling away on the slots.)

FROHIKE: They're just lucky I got a conscience.

LANGLY: How's that?

FROHIKE: If I unleashed my true kung-fu on this casino, I could break the bank within a week.

LANGLY: And find yourself buried under six feet of desert dirt.

(Timmy walks up from behind them.)

TIMMY: Hey guys.

FROHIKE: Hey Timmy. I'm sorry about Jimmy.

TIMMY: Hey, Langly, the guys are all up in my room for a round of Dungeons and Dragons in honor of Jimmy.

LANGLY: (puts his hand on his heart) Lord Manhammer will be in attendance.

(Timmy smiles and leaves.)

LANGLY: (to Frohike) I'm gonna go play a little D&D, uh, in memorium.

FROHIKE: That's touching, man.

(Frohike turns back to his slot machine as Langly leaves, but soon his attention is caught by a familiar laugh. He crosses the floor to find Scully surrounded by a hoard of men.)

FROHIKE: Scully?

SCULLY: Aw, hey. Long time, no see.

(The man to Scully's right leans in and whispers something into her ear.)

SCULLY: No, that's not nice. I like Hickey.

(Scully rubs Frohike's head, messing up his hair. A moment later, a pack of cigarettes is held out by one Agent Morris Fletcher, whom we all remember from the Dreamland/Dreamland II fiasco.)

FLETCHER: Cigarette?

(Scully leans in and seductively removes a cigarette from the pack with her lips.)

FROHIKE: You don't smoke.

SCULLY: But who's got a match?

(In less than a second, a dozen lighters pop in front of her.)

SCULLY: Well ... I just can't decide who lights my fire.

FROHIKE: That's it. (grabs cigarette from Scully's mouth) Alright, you dandies, back off. This is Special Agent Dana Scully of the FBI. If you so much as touch her, you may be committing a federal offense. (to Scully) Come on, come on.

(As Frohike pulls Scully away, Fletcher says his goodbyes.)

FLETCHER: We could have been stardust.

SCULLY: Maybe next time.

(Scully gives Fletcher one good slap on the ass before Frohike finally pulls her away.)


(Inside a hotel room, the door opens to reveal Langly and Timmy.)

LANGLY: Hope you brought your wallet, my friend, just because this is a memorial ... (enters room and sees two Men in Black) ... game. What's this?

TIMMY: Oh, we have got a game for you.

(Grabs Langly firmly on the shoulder.)

LANGLY: Man ...

(Back in the Lone Gunmen's room, Modeski and Byers are looking at the tape.)

ELLIS ON TAPE: Trust me, this is gonna work.

(Modeski stops the tape.)

MODESKI: You didn't tape this?


MODESKI: Which means they surveilled us. They know our plans, they know everything.

BYERS: What is your plan?

MODESKI: To escape. This conference was our chance to slip out on the last day. Go public with our files, all our weapons research. We could finally make it happen this time. We'd gathered up enough proof. The public is ready to believe now more than ever. They know everything. They'll kill us, John; Grant and me both.

(Just then, the door opens and Frohike enters with a stumbling Scully.)

SCULLY: (laughing) Hi.

FROHIKE: Settle down, settle down. (sits Scully down on the bed)

SCULLY: (laughing and grinning) Okay, okay, okay, okay.

FROHIKE: I found Agent Scully-go-lightly holding court ... (Scully grabs Frohike's ass) ... bar!

BYERS: I've never seen her drunk before ...

MODESKI: (checks Scully's eyes) God, this can't be.

(As Susanne checks Scully's hair and head for a needle puncture, Scully, grinning from ear-to-ear, pretends to tickle her.)

SCULLY: Hi ...

(Modeski finds the needle puncture just behind the right ear.)

MODESKI: She's not drunk, look at this.

(Frohike and Byers get a closer look at the needle-puncture.)

MODESKI: That was made by an injector gun.

FROHIKE: Well, what the hell was she injected with?!

(Scully shrugs her shoulders and holds her hands out palms up in an "I don't know" gesture, still laughing like a loon.)

MODESKI: It's derivative of AH gas. AH, anoitic histamine, my latest creation. (Scully makes a face quietly, pursing her lips in an "oooo") I could have developed it years ago, but I held off. I wasn't about to let those bastards I work for get their hands on it. (Scully makes what kids would call a frowny face) Grant thought that if we secretly developed a small batch, and then destroyed the notes, that we would have the proof we needed to go public. We'd also have a weapon we could use against them.

BYERS: Who else has access to this anoitic histamine?

MODESKI: Grant and I are the only two people that ha ... (realizes the implications) ... that have the samples.

(Scully shrugs her shoulders again.)


(Still in the Lone Gunmen's hotel room, Modeski fills a syringe with some chemical. Langly enters, returning from his encounter with Timmy and the Men in Black.)

MODESKI: This will counteract the anoitic effect.

SCULLY: (to Langly) Hi, cutie. (Susanne injects Scully) Oow ... just a little prick ... (passes out)

LANGLY: Bad trip?

MODESKI: Nah, she'll be fine. She just needs to sleep it off.

FROHIKE: I don't understand; why would the government want to turn Scully into a bimbo?

MODESKI: That's just a potential side-effect. Anoitic histamine impedes higher brain functions. It promotes suggestability.

BYERS: Mind control. Brainwashing.

FROHIKE: That explains Jimmy. They told him to commit suicide.

BYERS: And Scully. They made her forget her autopsy findings. But what is their larger purpose? What are they planning?

FROHIKE: Well, whatever it is, we better find out fast.

(Zoom in to a tight shot of Langly's right ear, where we see the tell-tale needle puncture.)

[Fade to black]


(We see a hotel room door open to reveal Langly. His hair at first appears to have been *gasp* cut off! But we can soon see a ponytail running down his back and under his shirt, whew!)

TIMMY: Right on time.

(They are now seated across from each other at a table. Timmy hands Langly a handgun.)

TIMMY: This is your weapon. All you do is pull the trigger. You will enter the Saguaro Room at 10:05AM. This badge (hands Langly a badge) will give you access. Take a seat toward the back, and wait. At 10:15, a break will be called. Rise, approach the target, and fire three shots.

(Later, inside the Saguaro Room, we see Langly enter and take his seat.)

SPEAKER: This brings us to the notion of acceptable risk. Of course, risk is defined as exposure, during both utilization and post-project evaluation. Now in a secure proving-ground, i.e. a domestic engagement, we have had great success. Now off-shore utilizations can afford a more comprehensive definition of acceptable risk. Proper target appraisal can provide a risk-free trial environment. A combination of political instability and lack of efficient infrastructure can offer a, uh, target area of nearly zero risk potential.

(Langly slowly scans the room and settles his gaze on Susanne Modeski and Grant Ellis seated at the speakers table. After smiling tightly at something Ellis says, Modeski checks her watch. The time is 10:13. She looks impatient. Outside the Saguaro Room, Scully approaches the door.)

SAGUARO ROOM GUARD: Authorized attendees only.

(Shows him her badge.)

SCULLY: I'm an FBI agent.

SAGUARO ROOM GUARD: Authorized attendees.

(She snaps her badge closed. Cut to inside the Saguaro Room as Langly checks his watch and then Ellis checks his own.)

SPEAKER: Of course, risk management goes hand-in-hand with operational preparedness, and that happens to be our topic for the remainder of the session...

ELLIS: Al, I think this would be a good time to take a break, shall we?

SPEAKER: Oh, yeah. Let's take five everybody. Smoke 'em if ya got 'em.

(As everyone rises to leave for their break, Langly stands and casually walks toward the front of the room. Modeski, at the front of the room shaking hands with attendees, appears to be unaware of the approaching threat. As the action moves into slow motion, Langly pulls the gun from his jacket and aims at Modeski, firing three rounds, each hitting her chest. The last one splatters blood on his glasses.)

ELLIS: Oh my God.

(Langly simply replaces the gun in his jacket and walks out.)

MAN: Somebody help her...somebody...!

ELLIS: Susanne...

(Scully passes the Saguaro Room Guard into the room, followed by him as she approaches Modeski.)

SCULLY: Federal agent. (to Saguaro Room Guard) Call for help.

SAGUARO ROOM GUARD: Winston Warbler, we need an ambulance, a woman's been shot.

(Inside the Lone Gunmen's hotel room, Frohike and Byers suit up in paramedic uniforms.)

SAGUARO ROOM GUARD: (oc) She's bleeding, hurry.

FROHIKE: We're on our way.

(Frohike and Byers rush out of the room.)

(Back in the Saguaro Room, Ellis is crouched over Modeski.)

ELLIS: Who did this? Who did this!?

SCULLY: Shooter got away. (to Saguaro Room Guard) Detain this man, get him outta here.

(Frohike and Byers arrive in their paramedic guises as Ellis is taken away.)

FROHIKE: (quietly to Scully) Good work, party girl.

(Scully looks confused for a second. Frohike and Byers load Modeski onto the stretcher and wheel her out of the room as Timmy emerges from the crowd. After Frohike and Byers have taken Modeski out, Timmy crouches over the blood stain on the floor, touching it and smelling it. He then tastes it, implying that it is not blood at all.)


(An elevator door opens to show Scully, Ellis and the Saguaro Room Guard inside.)

SCULLY: (to Saguaro Room Guard) I'll take him from here.

ELLIS: Wait a minute, where ... where ... where're you taking me?

(Inside Modeski and Ellis's hotel room, Byers unlocks and opens the door to find Scully and Ellis. Ellis enters the room and is shocked to find Modeski alive, still covered with three distinct bullet wounds.)

ELLIS: Susanne?

MODESKI: Can we have a moment, alone, please? I'll be fine.

(Scully, Byers and Frohike start out of the room.)

BYERS: We'll be right down the hall.


(As Frohike passes Ellis, he holds up the black chip he gave him.)

FROHIKE: Thanks for the tip.

(Scully, Byers and Frohike leave the room.)

MODESKI: Big surprise, huh? Since you programmed my friend to kill me.

ELLIS: No, Susanne, it wasn't my idea.

MODESKI: You knew about it. You gave it to them. The AH. If I hadn't thought to check Langly, if I hadn't given him the antidote ... (opens shirt to reveal blood pouches) ... I don't understand. Why save me? Why save my life just to take it away?

ELLIS: You know why.

MODESKI: You were done with me. You had what you wanted.

ELLIS: "They" had what they wanted. The project was over. Honest to God, it wasn't my idea.

MODESKI: All those years you spent gaining my trust. You pretended that you loved me. What could they possibly give you for that? (she begins to yell and cry) What was it worth to you, Grant? What was your price? What did you get!

ELLIS: Life. They'd kill me.

(Suddenly, the door opens and closes, as Timmy enters the room.)

TIMMY: Hello. (points gun at Modeski)

ELLIS: I'm so sorry, Susanne.

(Timmy turns the gun on Ellis, firing two shots, killing him. He then turns the gun back on Modeski.)

(Inside the Lone Gunmen's hotel room, Langly sits at a desk with two computers, searching through files with Frohike and Byers standing on either side of him.)

BYERS: County death records first, then the state tax rolls, come on! Then the Clark County Morgue list that they misplaced the body.

LANGLY: Yeah, Voltaire comidant. Why don't you just zap me with the girly sting there and brainwash me again.

FROHIKE: (hands Byers injector gun) I say do it, then we can make him cut his hair.

(Suddenly, they are interrupted by a knocking at the door.)

BYERS: Can you answer that?

FROHIKE: Why me, she's your little chickadee.

(Frohike crosses the room to the door.)

BYERS: Hurry up, come on.

(Frohike unlocks the door and opens it to find just Modeski.)

FROHIKE: Come on in, Mata Hari.

(From behind the wall, Timmy appears with a gun, pushing Modeski into the room.)

TIMMY: CIA, freeze.

BYERS: Let her go.

TIMMY: Sure ... (cocks gun, points it into Modeski's back)

BYERS: No...

(Byers rushes Timmy, but Timmy pistol whips him, knocking him to the floor. Timmy then turns the gun on Frohike.)

TIMMY: You know the best thing about killing you three ... I won't have to dress like you anymore...

(Timmy is cut off as Byers uses the injector gun on his ankle, shooting him up with anoitic histamine. Timmy loses his balance and falls on Byers.)

BYERS: Oh, get him off me.

(Frohike and Langly hurry to get Timmy off of Byers.)

TIMMY: (delirious, to Langly) Hi, cutie ...

FROHIKE: (to Byers as he helps him up) What do ya wanna do with him?

(Byers just smiles. Cut to a television newscast, later that night in Scully's hotel room.)

REPORTER: Police confirm an arrest has been made, this man (picture of Timmy) Timothy Landau of Aldonaberta, New Mexico, has confessed to the murders of Grant Ellis and Susanne Modeski. Both victims were government employees attending a conference in Las Vegas.

SCULLY: (on her cellphone, shouting) Hello, Mulder? Can you hear me? I'm at the hotel. Where are you? What do you mean, "what hotel," Las Vegas. I'm in Las Vegas, aren't you? You called me. What do you mean you didn't call me? Oh man, I am gonna kick their asses.

(Outside the casino, Frohike and Langly are loading luggage into the trunk of a cab as byers talks with Modeski. (Cab number 4613).)

BYERS: Susanne Modeski is dead. Every computer in every county, state, federal office knows it. (hands her slip of paper) This is who you are now.

MODESKI: Come with me.

BYERS: (struggling with the choice) You'll be safer without me.

MODESKI: It doesn't make a difference. I told you, I'm going public.

BYERS: No, you're not. You've done more than enough. Leave it to us now, it's what we do.

(Modeski opens Byers' hand and places a small object in it, closing it again.)

MODESKI: It was meant for Grant. I want you to have it.

(In "Unusual Suspects" fashion, Modeski gives Byers a kiss.)

MODESKI: Someday.

(Modeski gets in the cab and closes the door as Byers opens his hand to see his gift. He holds it in the light to show us a gold ring. (The scene now echos the opening dream, Byers "alone" in the desert with the wedding ring.) The cab drives off, taking Modeski with it. The trio stands by for a moment.)

FROHIKE: So you wanna hit the slots?

(They turn and start to walk towards the casino.)

LANGLY: You know, Byers, growing old with us ain't so bad.

FROHIKE: Oh, shut up, Langly. You really want him to kill himself?

LANGLY: Got any quarters?


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